You Don't Have To Be Born With "It"

Having grown up in the US, I was very content with my jeans and Gap sweatshirts. Desi clothes never really became a issue for me. I marveled at the sparkling and feminine affects of sarees, ghararas, lehngas and such, when i would see actresses or others wearing them, but i never transferred that to myself.

When I got married and had to buy a whole new wardrobe, I was in pakistan, and I had absolutely no idea as to what to get. I blindly somewhat followed the advice of well-meaning aunts or chose outfits which looked pretty to me.

Returning to the US and entering upon the married social scene made me become more aware. It was more of a sense of feeling conscious, because even though I might have thought the outfits were nice, I wasn't confident that they suited me.

Anyway some more years of school and young motherhood passed by, without any real reflection upon this issue, after all it seemed a rather trivial one.

Then it came the first Ramadan, then Eid and then some ocassions in a row, which brought me to realize that I was deeply dissatisfied with my desi wardrobe. My friends wore their outfits with grace and they carried themselves so well, and I really felt awkward. In the past I resorted to feeling that this was just not me, and either one had it or they didn't. However now, I became determined and resolved to get to the bottom of why I was lacking self confidence in indo-pak outfits at indo-pak events. So I started to ask a lot of questions from my friends and from vendors. And I learned a lot. Indian/Pakistani clothes had seemed so straightforward, but I realized there is much involved. From the type of fabric, to the color, to type of embroidery, to the type of cut of the kameez and the style of the salwar and so much more should be evaluated in choosing what looks good an individual. I learned all this through trial and error. I made a lot of mistakes but i did not give up, and eventually I had a very good grasp on choosing the best outfits for myself. The wonderful discovery I made was that, although there are indeed those who are naturally born with the ability to look good in anything, however, if you choose outfits which suit you, you will enjoy wearing them, and subsequently you feel confident, which will lead you to almost automatically then carry yourslef with grace and self-confidence!

In future articles I will share with you many aspects of what I learned, in order to help you all out in choosing the best outfits for you.